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One of the babies has a cold so he woke up last night at 1 am for a bottle. As I am sitting there feeding him my mind goes to an incident that happened a few months ago with my 12 year old. Things at her dad's house are a little difficult for her at times with her stepmother. My daughter was at a friend's house, a friend she has had for years, and she spoke to her friend's mother about some of the things she has been through. Instead of this mother keeping my daughter's venting to herself, she told the stepmother what had been said and asked "what in the world is going on in that house?".
I ask you, if a child comes to you in confidence and actually confides these things in you, why in the world would you break that confidence and tell these things to the object of aforementioned conversation? Don't you think there is going to be further backlash for this child because of what you have said? It's difficult enough to get a 12 year old to talk sometimes, I am not thinking an incident like this is going to help that situation! Life is tough for kids these days, I encourage you to be there not only for your own children, but your children's friends as well. You never know what they might be going through and you could be the one they confide in. You can make a difference in a child's life...it really does take a village!
Let me know what you think.
I am not a doctor. Any advice or opinions I give are simply advice from life experience and not that of a professional!
I love the fact that you have a blog!! A good way to keep in touch. As far as my comment goes. . . is that woman NUTS? Does she NOT have an ounce of common sense?? Definitely someone you can't trust. I feel terrible for your daughter (won't mention name)!
ReplyDeleteI too have a 12 yr old in my household and it's rare that she opens up. I encourage her to talk to anyone she feels comfortable with. The problem w/that is it's my niece she talks to and she doesn't understand what she's going through and talks to her mom (my sister) about it. NOT A GOOD THING! It always comes back to bite me in the butt and I feel the 12 yr old is always being judged.
WHEW! I like this blog! I can get things off of my chest too!!! What's the next topic? :D
I had a chat with my little one about adding a disclaimer before she opens up to people and let them know that she is choosing to talk to them because she trusts them and to keep what she says only between them. I explained this may not always work so you really have to be careful with what information you put out there. Once you give someone information about you, you can't control what they do with it. It led to the "choose your friends wisely" talk, too.
ReplyDeleteAlthough it was a bad thing, it did lead to good conversations!
I'm glad you like the blog, check back tomorrow for "Tumultuous Friday"! So named because the topic could incite quite a bit of upheaval in my life. I am going to do these every Friday...the topic for tomorrow could get ugly!
I agree with the first comment, where is this woman's common sense? Terrible!! I am a big follower of the Nancy Grace show and always see over and over, children trying to warn adults of what's going on and the adults failing them!! Now I realize a lot of situations are not as serious as those that are on Nancy's show, but my point is that adults seem to fail children A LOT. Like the second comment said, this is good because it can open up even more dialogue between you and your daughter based on this bad incident. I want to give her a hug!
ReplyDeleteLove it cindy very happy for you:)
ReplyDeleteThank you for the posts! After I get my cable hooked up I will be posting my "Tumultuous Friday" entry...check back later!
ReplyDeleteDon't let any more time go by without fixing the problem. I waited too long (thank god just in enough time) to get my daughter help. It will NEVER happen again, I will never allow another women or anyone treat my daughter like this again. Or a HUGE court battle WILL happen. I feel soooo guilty I didn't do it sooner.
ReplyDeleteI did speak to an attorney about what you are referring to and was told there wasn't anything I could do and to seek counseling, which I am doing. The issue is, they have to agree to go. If they don't and the counselor thinks it's a bad situation, then the counselor has to recommend removal. It IS INSANE to me!
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